How To Succeed With Women

Other Confidence Builders: Easy Ways To Raise Your Confidence Level

Be in “The Zone”
Peak performers talk about being in “the zone” or in “the flow”. You are in the zone when you are at your best, when all your inner resources are available to you, and when you seem to automatically handle everything well.

We’ve all had these moments. Sometimes they take place during sports, when a rock-climber, for instance, is so engaged in the climb that he forgets about everything else in the world but what he is doing. Surgeons report that when they are doing surgery, they are so involved that it’s like they are in perfect harmony with the world around them. If you can remember a time when you effortlessly and peacefully performed beyond what you usually were able to do, you have been in the zone.

People who are falling in live are in the zone. You probably have felt it. When you were with her, it was like time stood still. You could do no wrong, and life, when you were with her, seemed effortless. When you were together you were creative and happy, and not worried about yourself or about your life. This is the zone as well.

Let’s look at the opposite example. Randy was very interested in Donna. He thought she was cute and mysterious and very much wanted to have a romantic relationship with her. It was terribly important to him that all of his interaction with her be great for her, so that she’d like him and want to go out with him. He was so focused on this goal, and on how bad it would be if she didn’t like him, that he was weird and distracted when he was with her. “I was such a jerk,” he says now. “I so wanted to impress her that I talked a mile a minute, made jokes that weren’t funny, and was all-around a tense, jumpy guy.” Because he couldn’t stop thinking about his outcome - having her like him – he could never be relaxed and unconcerned with her. “I scared her off,” he says. “I was so wrapped up in what I wanted to happen with her, I never was present with her when we were together.” His inability to pursue his goal with her, and give up worrying about the goal at the same time, made him out of the zone, forced, and not attractive.

Women you have chemistry with are women you are pursuing, but you are not worried about the outcome. For some reason, with certain women, it’s easy for you to not worry, and to get into the zone. You can, however, train yourself to worry less and less in your interactions with women by simply making that your intention. You can remind yourself, when you go into interactions with women, that the outcome isn’t important. When you do this, you’ll find that you are getting into the zone, that you are more relaxed, and that you have better chemistry. When Randy learns to not be worried about how it goes with Donna, and has some faith that everything will be okay, he relaxes, and it makes it easier for Donna to get to know him and to find him attractive. All the rest of the tools you learn in this blog – seduction strategies, meeting women, going for that first kiss, and more – will be much easier to practice and have success with if you train yourself to follow this credo.

Make decisions
Decision-making is a muscle that gives you control over and confidence in your life. But you must practice. You don’t want to be a control freak with women, but you don’t want to be a useless wad of indecisiveness, either. Being decisive means you never, every say, “Oh, I don’t know, what do you want to do?” it means that when those little meaningless choices come up during the date – such as what table to sit at – you decide quickly and easily. If she’d rather sit somewhere else, then you can say “sure,” but always make decisions quickly when you are with her. This shows her that you are a guy who is in charge of his life and not wishy-washy, and will put you miles ahead of most of the other guys she meets. This seems obvious and simple, but it builds your confidence and sets the stage for seduction.

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