How To Succeed With Women

The Seven Dating Myths

You are ready to do the work to get women into your bed; now all you need is for me to tell you what the work is. But before I tell you the secrets to creating an abundant enjoy life, we must explore and dispel the seven dating myths. You’ve probably bought in to most or all of them; the first thing to do now is to clear them away.

Myth 1. If you are nice enough and interesting enough, you will get a woman
It’s great to be nice and interesting, but it is not enough; it’s not the same as being seductive. Most men don’t understand this. Your average man thinks that if he likes a woman, and she says that he is “sweet”, “interesting”, or “a wonderful friend,” that he’s moving the relationship toward eventual romance. He isn’t, because, as we’ve said, being nice and interesting is not the same as being seductive.

Myth 2. You are a nice guy, who only has nice thought and desires
Man who believe that they are really nice guys, who only have nice thoughts and nice desires, often break women’s hearts the most cruelly. Men who know that they aren’t always sweet, and who know that they don’t always have kind thoughts and desires, are often much more humane.

How can this be? After all, men who are committed to always being nice in every way should actually be nicer, shouldn’t they? Sadly, it doesn’t work out that way.

Look at it this way: over the course of any relationship, you have the opportunity to feel a wide variety of feelings and behave in a wide variety of ways. Statistically speaking, you can’t always be at your best. Sometimes you’ll be at your best, most of the time you’ll be at your average, and some of the time you’ll be at your worst.

Myth 3. Just “be yourself” and women will desire you
“Being yourself” doesn’t mean that you are utterly impulsive and driven by whatever behaviour is most convenient for you in the moment. In different situations, you naturally bring out different parts of yourself. In church you follow a certain “code of conduct,” but that shouldn’t repress you. It’s simply an opportunity to bring out the more formal, religious part of yourself. At the dinner party, you bring out the more cultured, sophisticated part of yourself. At the job interview, you bring out the professional part of yourself. You’re no “repressed” because you don’t ask her out. You are simply expressing a different part of yourself at that moment.

Myth 4. Women know what they want, and they will tell you
Have you ever noticed that women will talk about the kind of man that they want, and end up with someone completely different? It happens all of the time. What women say they want, and what they actually respond to, are often totally different.

This is actually a very human trait: there are probably things you say you want in your life that you only think you want. Women are no different.

Women can’t tell you what they want in a man – they can only tell you what they think they want in a man. There’s a big difference. They also aren’t attracted to men who approach as supplicants, begging for the easy keys to melt a woman’s heart. Don’t fall into the trap.

Myth 5. Be a woman’s therapist, and you’ll get sex
I’ll simply point out that being a woman’s therapist is one of the worst ways imaginable to get sex. Many men think it will work, but it almost never does.

Myth 6. Being “honest” means telling her the worst things about yourself
Many men seem to think that the best way to be honest with women is to tell them the worst things about themselves, the sooner the better. “Full disclosure!” seems to be these men’s motto. I think this is foolishness.

It’s good to be honest. But I believe that dealing with the consequences of the truth will almost always be easier than dealing with the eventual consequences of lying. However, this doesn’t mean that you should tell a woman every thought or desire you ever have. That simply isn’t useful. A man who believes this myth will often tell a woman his problem right way.

A man who “spills the beans” about his problems and his defects right away may bond emotionally with a woman, but she won’t desire him. She’ll think if him as a friend, but she may also think of him as a nut case.

Myth 7. Dating should be fair
This one myth gets men in more trouble than almost any of the others. If you are a man who whines about how dating isn’t fair, and how you have to do all the pursuing of women, you must stop that right now.

I hear it all the time: “Why can’t a woman ask me out for once?” “If women really believed in equality, they’d kiss me first!” “I’m tired of doing all the pursuing with women. It’s their turn now.”

My advice is to get over it. If you don’t have sex life you want, it’s your responsibility to get it. It is not women’s responsibility to take care of you, and to make sure you have what you want in relationships. Expecting them to do so is just immature.

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